The Lesson of the Little Fox

"Please - tame me!" he said.

"I want to very much," the little Prince replied. "But I have not much time. I have friends to discover, and a great many things to understand."

"One only understands the things that one tames," said the fox.

This is a scene from my favorite children's book of all time, The Little Prince (or Le Petit Prince in its original French) written by Antoine de Saint-Exupery.

The story of the Prince and the little fox is the story of love. It is at once both a cautionary tale and a celebration of what it means to truly connect with and understand someone in such a deep way that you are changed forever for having known them. 

The Prince, in his travels, stumbles upon a little fox, and the fox beckons the prince to tame him, but the Prince does not understand what "tame" means.

"It is an act too often neglected," said the fox. "It means to establish ties."

When the Prince questions further, the little fox goes on to explain:

"To me, you are still nothing more than than a little boy who is just like a hundred thousand other little boys. And I have no need of you. And you, on your part, have no need of me. To you, I am nothing more than a fox like a hundred thousand other little foxes. But if you tame me, then we shall need each other. To me, you will be unique in all the world. To you, I shall be unique in all the world. . . if you tame me, it will be as if the sun came to shine on my life. I shall know the sound of a step that will be different from all the others. Other steps send me hurrying back underneath the ground. Yours will call me, like music, out of my burrow. And then look: you see the grain fields down yonder? I do not eat bread. Wheat is of no use to me. The wheat fields have nothing to say to me. And that is sad. But you have hair that is the color of gold. Think how wonderful that will be when you have tamed me! The grain, which is golden, will bring me back the thought of you. And I shall love to listen to the wind in the wheat. . ."

So the Prince tames the fox under his direction, spending the time to make the little wild fox used to him, waiting to see him before he comes at the same time everyday. But eventually, as the Prince is a traveler, he must leave in search of new friends and adventures, and upon telling the fox of his departure, he becomes very sad.

"Ah," said the fox, "I shall cry."

"It is your own fault," said the little Prince, "I never wished you any sort of harm; but you wanted me to tame you. . . "

"Yes, that is so," said the fox.

"But now you are going to cry!" said the little Prince.

"Yes, that is so," said the fox.

"Then is has done you no good at all!"

"It has done me good," said the fox, "because of the color of the wheat fields."

He then offers him a secret upon their last meeting:

". . . It is only with the heart that one can see rightly: what is essential is invisible to the eye. . . Men have forgotten this truth," said the fox. "But you must not forget it. You become responsible, forever, for what you have tamed."

In understanding all of this, we must remember to be careful with each other, to cherish, to leave those we've loved better than we found them because, in a way, we are responsible for them forever.